The Pro's Prose
6-14-2010
From: DJ, PGA PRO
The Wrap Up!!
Congratulations to the 2010 Champs, Stan Wells and Kevin Phillips. They are deserving champions and will definitely look good in PINK!! Stan played steady all week, with all rounds in the mid 80's. KP was a little more adventurous, but posted a very good final round despite a mind blowing 10 on the 72nd hole. Great job guys!!
We had great weather, cold beer, good friends.... another great trip to the Desert. I am already looking forward to Duel 2011!! Maybe when things settle down we can do a fall or winter get together in Texas for a long weekend. We'll keep you posted.
Results are posted on the 2010 results page, check them out. Until next time, keep your head down and rip it!!
DJ
6-4-2010
From Danny Jones, Your PGA Pro
One day closer..........jeeez the clock is moving slow! One week from today is round 3, moving day, the day the creme starts to rise to the top. My middle name this year is CREME!!!! Let the games begin.......
I just dropped by to write a quickie to wish everyone safe travels and to let you know how ready everyone in Texas is to get to Vegas and play some golf and just hang out with good friends. We hope you northerners are ready for the heat (it's a dry heat) that you are about to fly into. My guess is Barty will love it!
Don't forget we have three newbies this year, Shane, Les and John, let's make them feel like lifelong members of the Duel! I will......
Until I see y'all in Nevada next week, Tee it high and let it Fly!!!
Danny
6-3-2010
From Danny Jones Jr, Pro
Getting ever so close to this years Duel in the Desert!! I have all my outfits laid out in the extra bedroom ready to pack. We have Wayne getting in early Monday, he has been supplied with a couple shopping lists for beer, alcohol, wine and supplies. THANK YOU Wayne!!! Once again we have a Corona and Lime theme at the pool daily, make sure you donate some cash to Wayne or Mitch (I am not sure who paid for all the beer and coolers etc) if you are going to participate in pool beer drinking activities.
The Para Mutual betting is pushing $2500 and we still have about 7 or 8 guys that have not bet. So it looks like $3000 will be the number in that side wagering pot.
The weather looks great, my game is in tip top shape (maybe), Shunney is going to show up, everything is set for a great Duel this year!! I will probably only write to you guys one more time before we head out next week, so I wanted to say to everyone travel safely and as always let's go out and have a great time in the spirit of Brotherhood. Just like a brother from another mother!!! Be safe, see y'all next week.
Remember on your putts, when in doubt on the break, hit em straight!!
DJ, pro
5-24-2010
From: Danny Jones, PRO
Hope everyone had a nice weekend and is working hard to get their game in shape for this years Duel. I understand we are approaching $2000 bet in the para mutual and that is with only about half the guys having their bets in. Paul would like to give everyone a printout before the first round of who bet on who and how much, this is why we keep pushing you to get your wagers in before June 3. He needs a little time to do the spreadsheet.
Two weeks from today me, Brian, Mitch, Wayne, Shane and Paul will be heading in to Vegas for some early preperations and supply shopping. I really look forward to seeing everyone Tuesday either by the pool or at least for some cocktails and dinner. Hopefully we can keep Brian from getting any scars. It's a dirty job, but we can do it!!
In case you all wondering, this years hat color is Orange with some sweet custom embroidery. I look hot in Orange, FYI.
Until my next update, which will be soon, remember to keep your head down and swing from the heals!!!
Yours Truly,
DJ
5-21-2010
From: Danny Jones, PGA Professional
Ahhhhhh, 3 weeks from today will be moving day, the 3rd round of the Duel. Which way will you be moving, that is the question of the day? You will know then exactly where you stand in your flight, how many guys you need to pass to be in the big money. Will you play conservative or aggressive?
This pro advises playing these golf courses fairly conservatively. My many years of experience say that in the fairway and on or around the green is all you need to score well at Primm. There are a few holes that you can be more aggressive on, but not very many. Just a little free advice from your travelling PGA Pro!! Once we get there I charge $80 an hour for this kind of information. $100 if you are from Elgon, IL!!!
Beware of the NEW GUYS this year, Shane Pearce (2 Handicap), John Duewel (18 and a friend of Danny and Dennis), Les Stanbery (18, a friend of Satan). You may want to put some money on these guys, just as a little insurance. Don't forget to get your betting slips in to Mitch or Paul as soon as you can, they will be emailed a couple more times to you as a reminder.
Until next time, practice those 3 footer, because they aren't gimme's at the Duel.
DJ, The Pro
5-19-2010
From: DJ
Well, before I get started I have to apologize to my extreme elder, Mr. Dennis Pierce for the percieved attack on him in Monday's column. Sorry Denny!!! I only pick on you because I love ya man!!
Someone was asking me the other day about the origin of golf etc etc etc. He then asked me how and why they came up with the name golf. I gave him the obvious answer, I said "well Joe, it's because FUCK was already taken". exactly 3 weeks from today the 2010 Duel in the Desert will be under way with some great golf competition. The weather will be great as always, and it will be a great get away and nice to see all my buddies.
A couple reminders, mandatory dinner at GP's Steakhouse on Thursday Night at 6:00 PM. Also, when you check in there will be a welcome packet for each of you at the front desk, make sure they give you yours, if they don't, please remind them.
Keep checking back here often for more frequent updates and reminders.....there will be plenty.
Until next time, keep it in the short grass!!
The Pro
5-17-2010
From: Your Pro
3 weeks baby!!! 3 weeks to sunny Las Vegas and this years Duel in the Desert!! 3 weeks and I open up a special can of whoop Dennis!! And Jimmy Frye......not this year buddy, you are playing for 2nd. KP's been working with Shane on his swing so he's F'd. Paul has a bad elbow, Barty has a bad back.....hell I'm buying stock in Advil. And who the hell knows what ailment Dennis is fighting this year.....maybe drinkers elbow or grumpy knees.
I got this all figured out. It's a war of attrition, all I need to do is behave myself and everyone else will either fall apart or be hungover enough to shoot 100. It worked a few years ago and I am due again in 2010. Mitch feel free to use that in your poem. Then there is Brian, enough said.
On the good news front....Mr. Mike Shunney has finally officially decided to bless us with his attendance at the 2010 Duel. What Duel would be complete without him? Hope everyone is ready to, it looks like we are all set for a great time with good friends and sunny weather. See y'all soon.
Remember, head down and swing hard!!!
DJ
5-10-10
By: DJ, The Pro
We are less than a month from getting together in Nevada for this years version of the Duel in the Desert!! Is everyone ready? Reminders to follow, but for now I want to tell you that we have several Duel Virgins this year, let's make sure we show them a good time as new Duelers. Welcome Shane Pearce, Les Stanberry and John Duewel... I promise you will have a good time as I whip up on you guys around the course!! It's what I do!
Reminders, first, don't forget about the mandatory dinner on Thursday night at GP's Steakhouse at 6:00pm. Next, make sure you are ready to go an hour before tee times at the front door if you need a ride to the course, I am not your wake up call!! Don't forget some of the special Duel Rules, all OB is played lateral, double Bogey Max for the first 3.5 rounds, we play the ball as it lies and gimme's are anything that is inside or touches the pink tape.
Lastly, don't forget to get your betting slip back to Mitch or Paul, it looks like from early signs there will be $2500.00 plus in the para mutual. Pick a dark horse and you could win some serious money!!
I will try and update this more often as we get closer to this years event. In the meantime if you have any questions or need anything answered let me or Mitch know.
Remember, if you don't get the putt to the hole it can't go in!! Sound Familiar?
Yours in the PGA,
DJ, Pro
5-5-10
By; The Pro, Mr. Danny Jones
Well Boys, we are just a little over a month from the Duel 2010. I am so ready to go, I bet we all need a vacation. What could be better than being with your buddies in warm and dry Nevada drinking some beer, playing golf and lounging by the pool?
Looks like we are going to have exactly 20 players. Mitch has re-done the rules and regs page with the corrected payouts. Don't forget, if anyone makes an ACE we all pay that guy $100 cash. I hope no one has an issue with that, and we assume that guy will at least pick up the lunch tab. $20 cheeseburgers for everyone!!!
A few of us are going in to Vegas Monday night and staying at the Southpoint if anyone wants to come out a day early! If not you can find us by the Primm Pool Tuesday afternoon when you arrive. Oh, almost forgot, also posted are the first round parings and tee times, this saves us time that first day getting organized.
Lastly, don't forget to place your wagers on the paramutual betting. Mitch emailed out the betting slip and a sample of the spreadsheet. If you need it again let Mitch or Paul know. Just another way to maybe make a few bucks.
Keep checking back here for more updates, and remember if you don't get it to the hole it won't go in!!
See you soon,
DJ, Pro
4-27-2010
By: Danny Jones, PRO
Good Morning from Montgomery (Houston) Texas!!! Only 40 short days until we tee it up again in sunny Primm Nevada. I can't wait, I need a vacation.
First, let me thank everyone from the bottom of my heart for all your wishes during this past several days after my dad passed away. I really appreciate all you guys and your friendship. Most of all thanks for donating in his name to Golfers Against Cancer!!!
As I try and get back to a normal schedule, the Duel is what i look forward to most. Being with friends, golfing, swimming and drinking some beer.....what could be a better elixer. Of course, kicking everones ass wouldn't be bad either.
I will continue to update this column often as we get closer to the Duel 2010. I can't wait to see all you guys again in June. Until then, keep your head down and swing hard!!!
DJ, Your Pro
4-14-10
By: Danny Jones, PGA Pro
52 days until we meet again in Nevada. I just want you all to know how hard I have been working on the range since I disappointed at last year Duel. Maybe I should be a little less cocky this year......right!!! I have a PINK Jacket already. Do you? I didn't think so....but 2010 may be your year. I was looking good on Easter, I wore the PINK all day in the shop. That's right, for me it is not just a once a year in June kind of thing....I am a proud past Duel Champion.
This year we crown two more deserving champions while at the same time lowering their handicaps. Congratulations to Gerald and Jimmy.
We have 22 solidly comitted to attend this years Duel....with a couple stragglers on the fence, yes it's Shunney again. If you guys can, send him an email and give him a little extra push. Mike is missed when he can't attend. On top of that he has been knocking on the door for the last 2 years, finishing near the top. And we all know Mike would look sweet in some PINK.
That's all I got for now...........remember to keep it in the short grass, keep your head down and swing hard!!!!
Your Pro,
Danny
4-12-10
By Danny Jones, PRO
Hope everyone had a great Easter! Of course every year when Easter is over we begin the home stretch of preparations for the DUEL!! This year is no different. The pink jackets are ready to award, the courses are in great condition, they have their liquor license back (good news for DB) and the pool water will be warmer. Looks like we are going to have a full field again this year.....24 golfers. We are waiting on 3 last minute commitments, you know who you are!
As usual we will have our group dinner on Thursday after round 2. Mandatory, especially if you need to be there to collect a prestigious pink jacket.....ok Jimmy!
Last year we had a paramutual betting pool after round 2. This year we are going to send out the player and handicap list in about a week and have everyone place their wagers prior to June 3rd. Paul will then email out the spreadsheet of who bet on who. Both flights will pay.....win, place and show. All you need to do is pay Paul in cash before you tee off the first round for the bets you placed.
I look forward to seeing everyone this year in Primm, only 2 mnths away!!!
DJ, Your Pro
3-24-10
By: Danny Jones, Head Pro
Exactly 9 months since I wrote you last after the 2009 Duel.
Does anyone miss me? If you do you sure don't show it very well! Feel free to send me any well wishes anytime, you have my email. Just do it.
As the Olympics wind down this weekend it is time to start thinking about this years Duel on the Desert 2010. It looks like we are going to have a full field of 24 guys and maybe a couple on the wait list. The economy must be turning around or everyone just needs a get away. Either way, this years event promises to be the best ever.
Pink Jackets will be awarded to two new Champions, Gerald and Jimmy, at the awards dinner on Thursday night. A recorded song by David Keys (can't attend due to prior obligations) will be played as a tribute to the Duel. Words by Mitch, music by Keys.
KP says the morning beverage will be spicey bloody marys followed by the usual afternoon Corona and Lime at the pool. Handicaps will be sent out for your review in a few weeks, argue and negotiate if you want, Goldie will be the ultimate enforcer. So object at your own risk!
Keep your eye out hear for more information and updates as we get closer to the big event, I don't know about you guys, but I can't wait!!!
DJ "The PRO"
6-24-09
By; Danny Jones, PRO
I miss you guys!!!!
I've been siting around thinking this morning that I miss you guys, and honestly getting together once a year just doesn't cut it. So, I have an idea.
Mid September let's try and put a short trip together to LauBerge Casino and Golf in Lake Charles, LA. I'm thinking arrive Thursday, Golf Friday and Saturday......and leave Saturday night or Sunday. Does this interest anyone? If it does, shoot me a quick email with your level of interest or alternative ideas.
Until we meet again, swing hard you never know when you may make good contact.
"The PRO"
6-16-09
By: Danny Jones, Duel Golf Pro
The 2009 DUEL is in the books.
Hope this note finds everyone well and home safely. Congratulations to Jimmy and Gerald, they did what you have to do to win the Duel, put 4 good rounds together!!!
It seems like everyone had a great time, I sure did. Can't wait for the next one and maybe even a mid year reunion. We're talking about something in November right now and will keep you all informed.
This years results are now posted on the "2009 Results" page, go take a look, it was damn close!!!
In the meantime, hit 'em straight.
"The Pro"
6-5-09 PM
BY: Danny Jones, Your Humble Servant
OK Guys, I just want you to know that this Pro's Prose thing was not my idea, and anything said here was just for fun with no malice intended whatsoever. I really just want to keep everyone excited and fired up for the fun time next week. I guarantee it will be a great time. The weather report is outstanding, the beer promises to be cold and the company great as always.
If the golf is half as good as the guys on this trip it's a huge success!!
A couple housekeeping things Mitch wanted me to cover, first, don't forget to get your putter marked with the pink tape for the gimme line before the first round. Second, everyone will pay the maker of an "ACE" $100. Then that guy will buy the cocktails. Lastly, have a great time, there's no reason to stress anything while at the DUEL.
Travel safe and see you at the POOL!!!!
"THE PRO"
6-5-09
BY: Danny Jones, PRO
Who are these new guys? Or as I like to call them FNG's (f***ing new guys). Do we really know how they may perform, are their handicaps right, are we being fleeced? Who is this Wayne Michels guy, he can't even spell Michaels correctly, do we even know if that's his real name? He could be a former senior tour player named Trevino. And Jay Knobloch, didn't he play 2nd base for the Yankees? A pro athlete, come on!!!! Who invited these people? Gerlad Hargrave, I do know him and I am worried. Or maybe I'm not, I can't decide. Stan Wells, he is a newbie in my book, although I have been informed he was a Dueler back in the days. When exactly were those days? And wtf was his handicap back "in the days"?
Mitch, what are you doing to us....... bringing in more money for us to win, or........? I'm not really complaining, just saying .... as KP would say.
And speaking of KP, it looks like a two horse race in the poll between him and I...so vote often for the Pro, it's a smart thing to do. Just a few days until we all meet up in Primm, I seriously can't wait to see y'all out there.
Until later, keep it in the short grass.
The PRO
6-4-09
BY: Danny Jones, Head Golf Professional
Another day has passed, this time next week it will be the 2nd round of the Duel, the day that determines which flight you play in. My suggestion is to always play your best and let fate determine which flight you end up in. Trying to "mismanage" your game to get into the 2nd flight is never a good idea, it could possibly put you in the bottom of flight 1.
I hope everyone doesn't really think I am being a cocky asshole, this column is all in good fun. After all, when you're good, you're good, nothing i can do about that. HAHAHA.
So I got my suitcase out last night, laid all my shirts out that I want to take (my wife thinks I'm nuts)....and of course I carefully laid out the coveted Pink Jacket along with a nice plaid pair of shorts to wear with it. It's a HOT outfit!! I guess what I am trying to tell you is, I AM READY. Are you?
More later, until then fairways and greens!!
The PRO
6-3-09 PM Edition
BY: Danny Jones, The Only Duel PRO
Ahhhhhhhhhh,
Another day has passed, and that means we are one day closer to the annual Duel in the Desert, this is better than Christmas!! The voting continues for "who will win this years duel", obviously KP has more computers to access than I have family and friends. But it is getting closer, KP has 23, I have 19 and Drunk Bastard has 15. Keep the votes coming. I am almost over the top.
I was on the range today, working on my tempo. In case anyone cares I seem to have it dialed in!!! Just sayin, don't be a hater. I have a question, does everyone want a Cheeseburger after the first round? I know Billy will. That's funny shit right there. I crack myself up.
Until tomorrow my fellow duelers, keep 'em in the short grass.
The PRO
6-3-09
BY: Danny Jones, Your Head Golf Professional
Hi Again from Beautiful Texas,
I hope I didn't offend anyone yesterday with my plan to kick some ass!! But like I say, you better have a plan if you wanna kick mine. Ahhhhhh, 5 more days until we tee it up together in hot, sunny and dry Primm, NV. I can't wait to see all you guys and have a great time.
Have you all been watching the polls on the homepage of this website? KP and DB in the lead? They are either campaigning or practicing.......a lot!!! Their history at the Duel tells me they don't have a prayer. But who knows. Make sure you cast your vote (for the pro) everyday.
Well, it's off to the range this morning to hit some wedges. It's easy for me to practice because I live here at the course. Hope you all aren't jealous, it is what it is. I will be ready this year, but enough about me. I really wanna know who thinks they are gonna beat me, email me and tell me how at This e-mail address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it . I'll be waiting.
Take care and hit 'em straight, I do.
The "PRO"
6-2-09
BY: Danny Jones, Your Head Golf Professional
Good Morning,
Grip it and Rip it, Trust it and Bust it, Tee it High and Let it Fly............You guys can do all that. I prefer to go with the Fairways and Greens plan. And of course make some putts!!! A week from now we will be in or on our way to Sunny Las Vegas. It's time to formulate your game plan. Aggressive or Conservative, fire at the pins or middle of the greens, in Goldie's case go around the water or over it?? These are all things you need to consider now if you plan to beat me.
My plan this year is to show you why they call me the PRO. Yes, I know, you think it's because I drink red wine with Brian like a pro. Or I can fix Shunney's swing in 10 minutes on the driving range. Nope, not this year....this is the year I showcase my talents on the green grass. Watch out!!!
And if for some reason I don't live up to this plan, there is still beer and football at the pool and Merlot in the evenings to fall back on. So it's all good either way.
Check back again tomorrow for another stardate update. See you in Primm!!!
The "PRO"
6-1-09
BY: Danny Jones, Head Golf Professional
Fellow Duel Participants,
As the excitement builds towards the begining on the Duel 2009, it is important to remember the basic fundamentals of the golf swing. Tempo, tempo and tempo. And if that fails, keep your head down and swing really hard!!! And of course, there is always the last resort of following in the footsteps of the great Brian Buffone, and packing 8 beers and a bottle of ZING ZANG (look it up at your nearest liquor store), mix those two together and enjoy your day.
I head out to Las Vegas on Monday to make sure everything is ready for our arrival. The plan is to do some shopping for an extra large cooler, on wheels, for our afternoon pool time refreshments. Then, to the liquor store to purchase 10-12 cases of beer (mostly Corona), buy some limes and cut those up (can't have a Corona without lime), and make sure we have the proper water proof footballs to bombard Brian with.
After all that is finished we will settle in for a week of fun and games.
What I look forward to the most is the dinner with all the guys on Thursday night (GP's at 6 PM Dennis), from what I understand, this should be more entertaining than ever. Great food, good drinks, poetry and song...just to mention a few.
Once again Gentlemen, travel safely and check back here later in the week for more insightful news and golf tips.
The "PRO"
5-29-09
BY: Danny Jones, Head Golf Professional
I have been coming to the Duel for several years now and every year I look forward to it more than the last. The guys that have been invited and find a reason why they can't attend have no idea what they are missing!!!
Their loss.
I start my countdown at 100 days out. Everyday I send a text to Mitch with the number of days until the duel with a famous sports celebrity past or present who wore that number. It keeps US motivated. Not that we really need motivation to go hang out by the pool and play golf with 24 friends. But it is fun!!
This year looks like it is going to be the best Duel yet. A great group of guys, a chance to win back your entry fee and more, Corona and Lime at the pool, Nerf football, Dinner with everyone Thursday night including a song by Mitch and David Keys (a newbie with talent), the usual Poem and stand up by the other Dugan. And maybe a deaf joke from Shunney!!!
As I write this we are only 10 days from teeing it up in the desert again, I look forward to seeing everyone on Tuesday the 9th and wish everyone safe travels to Las Vegas.
Check here frequently for another update before we go and when we return from the Duel 2009.
The Pro
